It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize