Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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