I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
