Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
