After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
