i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
