we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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