Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
