Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
