You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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