talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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