i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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