I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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