Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
