My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Randomize
