wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
