grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
