ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
