I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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