I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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