Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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