I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
