His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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