I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
