i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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