Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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