I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
