Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
