He is an equal opportunity slut.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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