That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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