forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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