I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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