it wasn't lemon gatorade
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Randomize
