You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
