This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
