An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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