some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
