is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
