I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize
