I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
