dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
