omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
