I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
