They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
