so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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