Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
