Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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