i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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