he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
