I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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